Turkish Food, I Failed You.

So, this is what it was SUPPOSED to look like.

Just so you know, I’m really not as good of a cook as I think I am.  Sure I’m great at reasearch and I talk eating like a pro, but when the chips are down for trying something that I haven’t seen (or eaten) before I’m more like the Swedish Chef.  Whatever.

Anyways, the other day I was inspired to make something by the guy I have been dating.  Mister Man had spent the last two weeks on a business trip to Berlin in which time he told me about all the wonderful things he had been eating for like half a Euro.  I heard stories of beautiful chocolates, rough hewn sandwiches and these delicious folded packets called Gozleme.

A gozleme is basically Turkey’s answer to a crepe.  Done well, from what my recon tells me, they could make a kitten weep.  Gozleme are hand rolled into wafer thin sheets, crisped on the outside with a million brown spots and featuring forgiving chewiness on the interior.  Nestled gently within, a variety of fillings can be found ranging from spinach to eggs to seafood to whatever.  The total package is graced with melted butter before serving, rendering it perfect.

When Mister Man got back from his trip, I thought I would impress the pants off him with MY expert knowledge of making gozleme.  Have I eaten one before?  Hell no.  In fact, I’ve never even been to Europe.  Do I even really know what one looks like or what it’s filled with?  Not in realtime.  Of course I was going to be an expert at making these.  No question.

So I googled around a bit, found a bunch of recipes and YouTube videos of little old Turkish ladies rolling out gozleme like nothing and got to work.  I carefully massaged my tough dough for a full ten minutes, let it rise for forever and a day.  I rolled it wafer thin, piled on my toppings and this is what I made:

Damn son, you made some breadioli.

I made doughy packets of partially burnt stuff, encasing a bunch of other (overly salted) stuff and brushed them all with butter.  Nice try, but a far cry from the ones in Berlin.

However, I remain undeterred in my quest for making good gozleme.  I’m convinced that mine didn’t come out so wonderfully fabulous because I failed to roll them out to two microns in height, but I can see where the appeal might be.  I’ll keep you updated on my quest to make the perfect gozleme, but in the meantime you can try it yourself.  They’re tooooootally easy.  You got this.

Gozleme

Ingredients:

-1 part all purpose flour

-1 part Italian “”00″ flour

-1 big pinch salt

-Water

How to:

1. Determine how many gozleme you want to make, then designate your “part” sizes.  I used 1 cup of each flour, which made four.

2. Sift the flour and salt into a mixing bowl.

3. Add the water in increments until it just barely holds together.  (For my flour quantities, I used about 2/3 of a cup.)

4. Lightly flour your work surface.  Turn the dough out onto it and get kneading!

5. Knead the dough 10 minutes or so, until it transforms from a tight ball into a smooth, pliable dough.  Flour the board as necessary to prevent the dough from sticking.

6. When the dough is pliable, wrap it in plastic and let it sit for half an hour.

7. After a half an hour, chop the dough into chunks the size of a small orange.  Let them rest again, covered.

8. Prepare your fillings and melt your butter.  Gozleme can be filled with whatever you like. Popular versions include spinach and feta, egg, cheese, minced meat and seafood.

9. Roll each dough ball on a lightly floured surface until they are REALLY thin, like paper thin.

10. Put your filling on half of the dough spreading it within an inch of the edge and flat along the surface. Fold the other half over the filling and press the edges down to seal everything.  Continue to do this for all the dough you have, separating each gozleme with a layer of wax paper to prevent sticking.

11. Heat a dry pan over high heat.  When it is hot, put down your gozleme onto the hot pan.  It”ll quickly crisp.

12. Flip it over to toast the other side.  Brush the first side with butter as the second side cooks.

13. Transfer the finished gozleme to a plate as you fry the rest up.  Don’t forget to brush the second side with a little butter.

14. Enjoy hot!